A bit of a wake up call

Today I was determined to not be terrified of my 3 year old or having both kids alone with no plan for the day. I chose to keep positive, do my best to ignore him trying to get a reaction from me and get out the house. 

When we finally got in the car after several “OK I’m going, see you later” I just drove. I didn’t really have a plan but it was cold and horrible so really wanted to pop to a shop and get some bits to make an apple crumble and a casserole, yummy!

I also decided that we were not having any screens on today. I have relied on baby TV to keep the peace a bit too much recently, especially as I’ve been trying to pack for our holiday. The thing is, unsurprisingly, it doesn’t work. It doesn’t keep the peace really because Noah does everything in his power to get my attention, usually in a negative way. So today no TV, no games on phones and we were going to spend time together whilst daddy slept off the night shift. 

We ended up going to a wonderful little free farm near us. Thankfully Noah had wellies on already and winnie had her boots in the car because it was very soggy! They had so much fun in the puddles and trying their very best to stroke the piglets. Noah was a different child today, I think he felt seen and appreciated. I loved seeing him play with Winnie, he helped her through the puddles and taught her animal sounds but then I had the usual ‘mum guilt’ that I don’t see this side of him more often. He has very much become the ‘naughty’ child. I hate feeling like that. Today he became the big brother I want him to be, he ran after winnie and picked her up,  they both fell over laughing, but still, he tried to stop her running away. He wasn’t fighting for attention but content with sharing it and he was enjoying teaching winnie new things. I knew my little man could be this person and I feel awful that I hadn’t taken the time to find it before now. 

We are going on holiday tonight and it could not have come at a better time. A whole week to play with my babies that are growing way too quickly. I’m hoping this will be the start of me prioritising spending time with them instead needing to get the washing done or hoovering. I can’t believe I have become that parent.
This is what having little ones is about, splashing in puddles, wearing your brothers clothes (because I didn’t pack spares) and not having plans where you end up feeling like your kids are inconvenient. 

Enjoy your little people mummies, they grow too quickly and the time doesn’t come back! 

I love you my little wild ones! Xxx

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